Tuesday, July 14

MPH-Alliance winners are announced

Argh! It hurts! It burns my eyes! It breaks my heart! A little melodrama is therapeutic, I heard. Sharon Bakar posted the list of winners for the MPH-Alliance The Prize 2009. And my name's not in it. There goes my delusion, my last dangling hope like a monkey clinging to dear life while a swarm of ants gnaw at his tail. Splat. Just like that. Oh well. Life's like that. On with life. With more heads to open, with more bad news to break, with more life to be photographed, and of course, with more stories to be written. Just because I didn't get shortlisted doesn't mean my pieces were crap. I will find a way to publish them, maybe here. Then I can link the stories and you can comment on them. Want to post them here, but apparently even posting on my own blog would consider the stories published, and that will put a red light on getting them published anywhere else (never been published rule). One thing for sure though. I want to one day walk on the raised platform at Kinokuniya, my footsteps clomping on the polished wood, and stop by Malaysian Literature section, to see my name in print. The numbers of Malay English writers can be counted with one hand at the moment. But I refuse to do it for the Malays. I refuse to do it simply to see my name on the shelves. I want to do it because I love reading, and I hope to share that love, that experience, with the world. I want to do it because deep down, I know this is what I do best. Wish me luck.